2018 is cancelled

Along with the world almost literally blowing up, tensions among nations with the President's "duties," we all know the year 2018 is a garbage fire. To make matters worse, I have now had to say goodbye to two beloved family members, one human and one feline. Yes, the death of my Grandmother is probably more important since she ultimately is the reason I exist (other than my mom, who's her daughter). However, your pet is as much of a member of the family as you are, especially when they're rescued. 

Rescue animals deserve so much love and care, and they will love you back. We first go Butter (there was a yellowish tint where his orange and white fur blended) when a friend of my brother's discovered him on top of a spare tire under a truck in our school parking lot. He was brought home to us when we had only been living in our main family home for about six months. My mom figured that he was about eight weeks old, so we determined his birthday to be August 18. From there on, Butter grew up in front of our eyes. It seemed like time flew by and it was just reality that he had some health issues. He gradually lost his cat ability to jump up onto counters and needed to be picked up more. He was never really moving too slow. He seemed okay, even though he had an overactive thyroid. It was like things were kind of normal.

Then, the day came for my parents to consider options...and the best choice was to have him put to sleep. When I received the "We need to talk to you about Butter" message, I just knew. When I got to my parents' and found them cleaning...that confirmed it. It just didn't hit me until my mom had told me in person. It hurt knowing that he was probably in pain and that he was not long from naturally passing away. 

It seemed sudden to me because I thought he had a little more time left, so I never really got to say goodbye, and that's probably what sucks the most. It's nobody's fault. I was at work when it happened, and there was no way for me to just leave. I don't think I would have wanted to be at the vet's, but it would have brought a bit of closure to at least see him off and give him love one final time. Alas, I have the memories and the five stages of grief running through me all at once. I know I'll be okay, but it still doesn't seem real yet, especially the same year my Grandmother died. The ornament with his picture on it will definitely be in a special place this Christmas. 

I don't know if I will personally want a cat when I live somewhere that allows them. When you have the perfect one for the entirety of his life, it doesn't get much better than that. I am comforted, though. He was with his pal Tiger probably lying in a cardboard box eating Fancy Feast because it's what they deserve for eternity. And that's nice.